“Atom” – Medium Build

Feeling stuck? Like you don’t know the next step? Are you unhappy with work? A relationship? Can’t get out of bed? Can’t go to the gym even though you know you “should”? Feels impossible to get an oil change? To go renew your driver’s license? No motivation to do the small, seemingly menial tasks you know you “should”? I know the feeling well. The overall feeling of being stuck and just hanging on for dear life moving sluggishly from thing to thing.

Or maybe you are taking care of the tasks in front of you but it feels like a heavy lift. It’s exhausting and you don’t know how much longer you can push this rock up the hill. It’s in this time that you must become your biggest supporter instead of what you are currently doing which is punishing yourself, beating yourself up and putting yourself down. The belief is if you treat yourself this way it will motivate you to change however as humans we don’t work this way. Yes you need a level of discipline and grit however it has to be balanced with a level of compassion and empathy.

Currently I have a cooler that’s been sloshing around in my truck for 6 days. I think about it every time I get in the car to go somewhere and every time I pull back in the house. That said I haven’t brought myself to take it out of the truck, clean it out and put it away.

This was a familiar feeling for me throughout my life. I had so much to do I didn’t do anything. I would find myself too overwhelmed to do the things I needed then beat myself up for not doing anything. I would get overwhelmed and repeat the cycle over and over again.

It’s in these moments I just felt like I had too much to do that I couldn’t even make a dent so I would not even try. All the while I knew this would make things worse but I just could shift the pattern. In order to shift this pattern you must create new patterns. Healthy patterns. Patterns that work for you.

One thing to remember is change, no matter how small, is change. One thing that exacerbates the cycle of feeling stuck is thinking that you can’t make a dent. This is a lie. You can make a dent and it just starts with one small action. If you think of life it’s just a collection of “small” actions over and over again that lead to “bigger” outcomes. I’m someone who “plays well with confidence”. Meaning when I make good little decisions I tend to make better bigger decisions. What are some small actions to help you find movement to push against the stuck, isolated, overwhelmed feeling you are in?

If this is you, here are some things you can do in the morning that will help.

Make your bed. I know it’s not made right now. I’ve been there. I don’t have time to make my bed but I do have time to scroll instagram or youtube for 45 minutes when I wake up. Starting the day with an action that shows self respect and responsibility can do wonders. (Does making your bed mean you are responsible or not? Not necessarily, however when you walk in your room you will feel better seeing it made and it will subconsciously help you cut down on the clutter in your life.)
Take a shower. Yes simple but I remember those years where I would roll out of bed, throw on my clothes from the night before, put on a hat and walk out the door. I would show up to work looking and feeling like an idiot. I did not carry myself with any respect therefore how could I expect to be treated accordingly. Get up 10 min earlier, shower and put on a damn good looking outfit and go get ’em no matter where you are going.
Eat breakfast. I know you skip breakfast. I skipped breakfast for about 6 years. I claimed it was because I wasn’t hungry. But instead it was because fixing breakfast for myself just felt too overwhelming. Try this, make breakfast tomorrow morning and time yourself. I promise you can make two eggs and a piece of toast in less than 8 min. You have 8 min to spare. It sets your body and mind up to function for the day. You will be sharper, more energetic and have a better metabolism.

What you are cultivating in these small steps is a level of self respect. This self respect creates purpose and purpose creates movement. You need movement. You know what it feels like to be stuck, apathetic and unmotivated. To feel free, energetic and purposeful won’t just fall into your lap, you have to create it. These small steps will help you create that movement and that beautiful thing is this movement will roll into more movement. It will give you the motivation to do the other small things that you’ve allowed to pile up for far too long.

It’s the process of taking responsibility for your life.

Russell Grieger in his book “Developing Unrelenting Drive, Dedication and Determination” says,

“Responsibility is a belief in which one holds oneself 100% responsible for honoring one’s promise and commitments and producing intended results, no matter how hard it may be”.

Responsibility is a belief in oneself and requires some hardship.

I know it’s hard to do these things. I say that with no judgment and neither should you. The judgment doesn’t help. It just is as it is. Life is hard at times. But I think it’s harder to feel stuck, apathetic and “irresponsible”. It’s harder to constantly feel like a disappointment. Emphasis on the feel. You are not a disappointment but I know at times you feel like one. This lie is what you must push against to move forward.

It’s time to make a shift. It’s time to find movement. Start small. Make a commitment and see how it changes your whole world. You can do this. Make a commitment to yourself to try this for three weeks and notice how different you feel.

Now I’ve gotta clean out the cooler from my truck.